Taste of Via

I was on the phone speaking Farsi and I walk to the sample counter at Costco. I start pouring sugar and cream in the small sample cup of new Starbucks’ instant coffee “Via”. My phone conversation ended and I hung up.

“Are you Muslim?” The woman behind the counter asked with an unsure tone that if she is doing the right thing or not.

“I used to, not anymore!” I answered.

The charm on her face is now gone. She turns to me and asks disappointedly “can I ask you why?”

With a smile on my face I answered, “it didn’t work for me, god isn’t for me.” She picks up the coffee pot full of hot water and starts to pour the water in small sample cups.

She looks at me directly and says, “You know if a non-Muslim turn into Islam, it washes off all his sin but if a Muslim turn into another religion is not a good thing.”

I laugh catastrophically while think with myself “oh here we go, another person thinking that apostasy is wrong” I looked at her while she is fixing her hijab and say: “Islam didn’t work for me and if it works for you, good for you. It didn’t work for me.”
“Islam is the last religion,” she says. I take a sip and say, “no it’s not”. I look down to see her name on her nametag. “Shamba.” “She should be a Pakistani or Afghan by her look and Shamba is not a Persian name!” I think to myself.

She rephrases her words “there is no religion after Islam.”

“There is Baha’i faith after Islam” I answer.

She looks up again like she didn’t hear what I said or don’t know what I’m talking about. “It’s a man-made religion.” She answers me with a little bit of upset emotion in her face.

“No it’s not” I say it while I’m trying to keep my smile on.

“Can you prove it?” She asks.

Another customer walks toward her counter and picks up a sample cup and seems like that she overheard our conversation. From her uncomfortable face, you can tell that she is pretending that she hasn’t heard anything.

“Well can you prove that Islam is not a man-made religion?” I answer her back.

There is an obvious disappointment in her face. Existence of a new customer around makes her uncomfortable to answer me back. She looks down and keeps pouring water in those sample cups. I throw my cup away and start walking.

With an unpleasant voice she said, “Thanks for stopping by and trying our new product.”

بهنود و مادر مقتول

بهنود شجاعی در یک نزاع خیابانی بصورت غیر عمد و در حال دفاع از خود ۴ ساله پیش به سمت احسان (مقتول) حمله ور میشود و در نهیات با مجروح کردن او باعث مرگش میشود. بهنود در زمان قتل فقط ۱۷ سال سن داشت. ایران با امضا نمودن حقوق کودک در کنوانسیون مربوط پذیرفت که از حقوق کودکان دفاع کند. هر فرد زیر ۱۸ سال در قوانین بین المللی کودک حساب میشود. و چون بهنود در زمان قتل زیر این سن بوده طبق قوانین بین‌المللی حکمش به عنوان یک کودک باید مورد برسی‌ قرار بگیرد. بر طبق قوانین جمهوری اسلامی اجرای حکم به بعد از رسیدن به سن قانونی‌ معلق میشود.

مصاحبه زیر با مادر احسان نصرالهی است که به آزاد شدن بهنود شجاعی که پسرش را کشته بود رضایت نداد و منجر به اعدام بهنود شد. خانم نصرالهی به خاطر این رضایت نداد که خانواده قاتل در مدت ۴ سال حبس بهنود از او رسما عذر خواهی‌ نکردند و با امید داشتن به حقوق بشر و غیر، سعی‌ در مورد بخشوده شدن بهنود داشتند. بهنود به دفعات شخصاً خودش از مادر مقتول عذر خواهی‌ کرده است.

لطفا پس از دیدن این مصاحبه، فکر می‌کنید آیا اگر جای مادر مقتول بودید چه میکردید؟ دوباره: شما فعال حقوق بشر نیستید شما مادر مقتول هستید با یک پسر که او را از دست داده‌اید.

چی‌ فکر می‌کنید؟

عاقل و دیوانه منم

آباد اگر نمیکنی‌

ویران مکن مرا

Water

See the Water ain't safe no more
'I'm just trying to build my self to
act as a truley better man
damn'
See the water ain't safe no more
'Nah nah the water ain't safe no more'
I'm just trying to be a solid oak
tree for every child to carve
its name across
'The water ain't safe no more'
I'm just trying to be the dream of
ever peasant the hurricane
can offer
'I'm just trying to be some body I
can talk to in the morining
with a smile'
The Water ain't safe no more...

Je n'existe pas!

A Forbidden Status

حرف نزن

بعضی‌ وقتها خوب که از زندگی‌ و افکارت مطلع نباشند. لازم هست بدون اینکه بدونند انجامش بدی. اطلاعات زیادی لازم نیست.

در عمل انجام شده قرارشون بده.

On the Way to Tehran

I got to Tehran and I saw many interesting things on the way and in our own people’s behavior. My flight to Tehran was through Amsterdam with a stop in Detroit, which I later found out I only have forty five minutes to get to my Detroit- Amsterdam flight. With a fifteen minutes delay in my first flight and almost a heart attack I got to my second flight to Amsterdam on time.
In Amsterdam I had four hours till my third flight to Tehran. So I start walking around in search of some interesting stuff to see. Amsterdam has many tax free (aka duty free shops) that you can go visit and shop. I walked around and checked some stuff out. First I went to a cheese shop and start out with sampling a dry sharp cheese, I forgot its name though, and lack of wine samples made me almost choke. Next time I look for a medium size chunk of cheese not the biggest one! Then I went to a liquor and cigarette shop. Since smoking kills I only looked at liquors. Interesting thing was that if you fly through European Union you have to pay six or seven Euro extra for liquors compare to other places. I don’t exactly know why. Since I just found out that a liter of Absolute Vodka is only five dollars on the border of United States and then it markets for twenty-five to thirty dollars, I skipped the liquor shop as well. I smelled a few perfume and my nose stopped functioning properly so I left the perfumes too. I went to get some food from their little food court but for some reason when I see the Euro sign or anything other than dollar sign, I get a little cheap. I get money conversion attack and it makes me nervous that I have to use my Euros. So I persuaded my stomach to eat the banana I had in my backpack and not say anything else.
I got to the gate about two hours early and saw a few of people of my own sitting there waiting. I don’t know it’s only me or others too but for some reason I didn’t wanted to interact with them and I preferred to pretend that I’m not Iranian. So I chose a sit in a very last row in front of the window and sat there. I checked the plains and I got a little bored so I took my setar out and start playing the scales and going up and down till I got so sleepy. I took a short nap and then I woke up and saw they already started boarding. One thing that we, Iranian, didn’t like much was the fact that you were not allowed to have buggy in the waiting room, we didn’t want to leave that poor buggy alone till they warn us or say something that it is okay to leave them alone.
One unfortunate thing that I noticed was the lack of non-Iranian travelers and tourists to Iran. Iran is a great nation and I know for sure that if Iranian starts working on learning tourism culture and appreciation and make it easier for tourists to come to Iran, we would not need to sell a single drop of oil to support our oil-based economy.
My KLM flight was good and I had a few of my last Heinekens legally. We flew and flew and flew till we got on top of Tehran and I saw the lights. After some of the announcement by KLM crew, they would play the Persian version as well. When the plane got on the ground they announce in Dutch, English, AND Persian “Please remain seated and have your seatbelt on till the seatbelt sign goes off.” Even though, the moment that plane stopped for a second everybody jumped to get their carry-ons as fast as they could and run. The plane moved forward a little more and pushed everybody. I kind of liked how captain read my mind but the lesson wasn’t enough, no one felt on the floor, to teach us the lesson one more freaking time!!
Imam Khomeini Airport is the Iran’s new international airport that is the replacement for Mehrabad International Airport. IKA is on your way to the holy city of Qom. It was an hour and half drive from the airport to Tehran. On the way you will pass the Behesht Zahra Cemetery, Tehran’s biggest cemetery, and more importantly you pass Khomeini’s shrine. Unfortunately, my cousin and my sister were not that interested to wait for me to go and salute the leader. I have to go there again and show my respect to the man.
The sexiest man alive by People Magazine, George Clooney, was on one of Tehran’s billboard trying to persuade me to buy a watch. Not so successful though, I barely wear one.
One interesting thing that I noticed is driving in Tehran got much much better. It seems that people start noticing that there are some white things on the road that you have to drive between them not on them. Also a great applause to Tehran’s current mayor, Mr. Ghalibaaf, and the former mayor, Dr. Ahmadinejad, for making Tehran too beautiful with all the lighting that they installed under every and each bridge in Tehran that reminds me of some bars and strip clubs in the US. I start driving the sticks the day one and I was good at it, my problem is the street names and I barely remember which goes where.
I got a few 50,000 Rial bills (aka 5 toman) and these monsters are so big that I have to push it all the way down in my wallet with a quarter inch still left outside. I don’t know why they make these bills not to be cute and handy plus they could reduce the printing cost if they make them smaller.
One other thing that you notice if you travel from the US to Iran is the size of glass. Cups and glasses are almost twenty five percent smaller than in the US. Random!






I post pictures soon :-*

Are You Well Defined

We live in the world of words with their own unique definition or I call it a “dictionary.” Gender, roles, colors, moods, sexual preference, and even what to eat and how much to eat are all defined. If you do not follow the definition you ARE doing something wrong. And if you not get punished for this illegal activity that you have done, you will get the eye or by words to mention that you surpass the limits. By definition you did something that you must not do.

There are differences between wrong-doing, showing a better way to do something and changing something only to match our own definition
.
Each person has his/her own dictionary. We cannot judge them because their dictionary and definitions are different than ours. Just accept

...Enjoy being with me and the way I am or it’s only me who enjoys being with you

Today's Lesson

You learn something new everyday. The more asshole you are the better chance you have. Maaaan I always forced myself to be the nice one. the reason ? I guess I was trying to show more respect instead of being an ass. That's how you get treated my masculin feminist. "you are like my gay friend". oh nice that was my only goal. be the gay friend.

Well If that's how you might have a better chance, I rather be the masculin gay feminist one who has some dignity left.

2only 2

I drove and I don't know how. My eyes were that blury that I could only realize which ones red which ones green. I couldn't move my lips.I only opened my mouth once. oh goddess, what is happening? sting is singing. I'm still driving. "set that free". I can't wait. I can't wait. I cannot waiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!! no i can't

Fly

I want to fly, to somewhere that I could leave all these behind.
All these materials surrounding me.
All these extreme thoughts and thinking processes that make me choke and throw up.
All these people. yes all of them with no exception.
I admit the life I had with you was the best time, but I want people who are raha too, the free ones, the ones that you don't have to spend a thing to see their inside and out, who is honest to him/herself. The clear ones.
are you? Don't answer me. but are you? I won’t answer it either. Not your business.
I'm not sure if I fly I'm gonna get a round trip ticket. I just want to fly. I don't want to come back!
I'm trying to pack.
I don't want these clothes.
I've never been naked except in front of the bathroom’s mirror. How about if I fly naked? fun. hmmm.
yeap I liked this idea.
I admit I like to invite you too. but I won't take you there. I come with and for you but not instead of you. I admit that I can't spend that much time to get you prepared. If it takes you forever I have to leave you behind. I have to fly on a certain time.
You don't have to be naked, but be naked inside. I've seen it with hundreds of blankets before.
Back to myself. I want to fly even if I be all by myself. I'm tired and hungry. I’m not looking for black caviar on crappy toasted bread. I want to be drunk out of my soberness. I'll drink the soberness naked. I'll skin dip in eighty percent dark chocolate. hmmm.
I want to fly. to New York, to San Francisco, to somewhere that being a homeless is not so much fun but people accept you as who you are.
I'm a maniac. well I am, do you have difficulty understanding and accepting that?
My friend I flew out to here from another wilderness to this jungle. I guess I wasn't naked.
I won't repeat this mistake, like all other ones, one more time.
I'll fly with or without you.
If you are waiting for my formal invitation letter and the ticket, I might be gone by then.

مست

چه خشنودم و سر مست

ولی

‌
در درون می‌‌گریم

a non-sense poem for myself

حتئ ز غبار پنجره، نورها ز درون پیداست
من کجایم او کجا؟
آنها چرا؟
من که هستم؟!

درونم چه خالی‌
صدا میپیچد آرام
که‌ای مرغ سرگردان
بنگر
دانه فراوان
چرخی بزن، رقصی بکن، شیدا شو و دانه بجوی
کز اندرونت تابد، راه ها روشن کند
دانه‌ها ی نایافته، همچو لو لو یی صدف بشکفته
خواهی‌ دید،
پرتوات کهکشان ها را نور خواهد افروخت

بشنو این رمز‌ای دل، از دل شنو
کس نداند آن جز این
ای دل، رمزی شنو.

State of Purpleness

I still feel that shock
from that electric spark
inside my brain.
I wasn’t under the Bodhi tree
but helped me to see it later on.

I was unconscious when it sparked.
He is staring at me
with his all time self-righteousness attitude
and his blue eyes.
New York subway
train is going back and forth
like a hammock.
We are face to face and across from each other.
His lips are moving.
The girl next to him is laughing
while she cheers him for this achievement.
I didn’t even understand...
What did he say?

I turned twenty years old on that trip.
My thoughts were kicking their limited walls
they wanted to come out,
to explore but not to be explode.
Inside my brain was like a chemistry lab,
diluting liquids, some clear, some dull.
They were mixing those violet solutions
to create a form or to dissolve.

doubt
uncertainty

Once I saw it became clear
but changed to purple again,
the temperature is going up,
just needed the spark!

My lord, what’s happening?


I remember every moment of it
even the things that I didn’t understand
made me think
deep inside.

He lost his position in my life
the man, the Lord, the master of suffering
some call it God.
Don’t get me wrong
I was just too numb.
Now I can see
the truth, the reality, the game we play
and it’s crystal clear.

Thanks to my father
who never said anything
not forcing to be a certain way
and thanks to my mother
who kept me interested to be on my knee
and left the window open for me.

These thought processes all helped
to let the ego leaves
its favorite skin.
Now I can see.




--AmirAli Kani
Sept-08

2. کریزی شو کی به کیه؟

از با هم بودن لذت ببر، یا فقط این منم که از با تو بودن لذت میبرم.