State of Purpleness

I still feel that shock
from that electric spark
inside my brain.
I wasn’t under the Bodhi tree
but helped me to see it later on.

I was unconscious when it sparked.
He is staring at me
with his all time self-righteousness attitude
and his blue eyes.
New York subway
train is going back and forth
like a hammock.
We are face to face and across from each other.
His lips are moving.
The girl next to him is laughing
while she cheers him for this achievement.
I didn’t even understand...
What did he say?

I turned twenty years old on that trip.
My thoughts were kicking their limited walls
they wanted to come out,
to explore but not to be explode.
Inside my brain was like a chemistry lab,
diluting liquids, some clear, some dull.
They were mixing those violet solutions
to create a form or to dissolve.

doubt
uncertainty

Once I saw it became clear
but changed to purple again,
the temperature is going up,
just needed the spark!

My lord, what’s happening?


I remember every moment of it
even the things that I didn’t understand
made me think
deep inside.

He lost his position in my life
the man, the Lord, the master of suffering
some call it God.
Don’t get me wrong
I was just too numb.
Now I can see
the truth, the reality, the game we play
and it’s crystal clear.

Thanks to my father
who never said anything
not forcing to be a certain way
and thanks to my mother
who kept me interested to be on my knee
and left the window open for me.

These thought processes all helped
to let the ego leaves
its favorite skin.
Now I can see.




--AmirAli Kani
Sept-08